


Seventeen

by lynna21



Category: The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: Epistolary, M/M, Songfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-09
Updated: 2017-08-09
Packaged: 2018-12-13 01:59:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,050
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11749734
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lynna21/pseuds/lynna21
Summary: Daryl writes a letter to himself.





	Seventeen

**Author's Note:**

> I had a completely different song in mind for this challenge, then this song came on the radio, and that was it. Inspired by Brad Paisley's, "Letter to Me." https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RQ3bn7V0zdU

 Dear 17-year-old Daryl,

This is really fucking stupid. Rick insists that it helped him, though, and he’s been on my ass about it (not in the good way) for the last month. So, here it is.

Your life sucked at 17. Hell, let’s be honest, your life has sucked for a helluva lot longer than that.

I know that you blame yourself for what happened to Momma, but nothing you could have done would have changed it. Her fate was sealed the second she met Will Dixon. I know that you think all the times Daddy hit you were your fault, but you’re wrong there, too.

I know about the bottle of Jack you stashed in that old, hollow tree behind the Piggly Wiggly, and hell yes, that was a great hiding spot. Don’t use it for too much longer though. Merle is gonna find it, drink it all up, and get into a car wreck. He’s an even bigger pain in the ass with two broken arms.  

I know what you think about when you’re biting down on the palm of one hand, while the other is down the front of your pants. I know there isn’t nearly the amount of tits and pussy that you tell Merle about. Lots of cock though.

Sometimes you think that it’s not worth it, that you’re not worth it, and you want to run out into the forest and never come back. Live in a shitty little cabin, with nothing but the wind for company. But if you do that, you’re gonna miss out. See, a few months after you turn 17, you’re gonna meet this asshole sheriff. He’s gonna arrest you and Merle both, for doing what you know _damn well_ you shouldn’t be doing.

Anyway, this guy is gonna arrest you, but instead of recommending that you go downriver for just as long as Merle is, he’s gonna vouch for you. Even when his asshole of a partner has some serious words with him about it. He’s the first person in your entire life who hasn’t let you down. Ever.

I’m trying to save you a lot of trouble here, kid. A lot of wasted time, and energy. No matter what you do, this guy isn’t going to back off. He’s a stubborn son of a bitch. He’s not going to hit you, or use you, or any of the million things you’re probably thinking.

All he’s going to do is believe in you. I know that sounds stupid, and cliche, but hear me out...

He’s going to show up at your trailer one day, in that stupid, shiny ass cop car, and start talking to you. Not about anything important. Just the weather and dumb shit like that. He’s going to pretend he knows how to hunt, but you’ll see right through that. Don’t be afraid to call him on it. He’ll think it’s hilarious. Instead of flipping him the bird, and running off into the woods, stop for a second, and listen to him.

Leaps of faith aren’t really your style, but this one is worth it, I swear.

He’s gonna keep coming around. You’ll even think about moving just to get away from him. Go so far as looking at a shitty apartment over in Toccoa. But, god… He never stops trying. The first time you take him hunting, he scares away all the game in a ten mile radius. He gets this proud little smile on his face when he manages to set up a snare, though. Makes going hungry that night worth it. The feeling you’re going to get when he turns that smile in your direction? When you see the unfiltered joy on his face, and that damn twinkle in his eyes? It’s not ever going to go away. It’s been twenty years, and it still happens every time he smiles at you.

Don’t let it scare you. I know you don’t live in the most tolerant of areas, but nowadays, most people have more to worry about than who you’re fucking. And you want to fuck him. You do. The first time you met him, when he pressed you up against that car? The feel of his breath against the shell of your ear when he read you your rights? I know what was happening in your pants, kid. He read me my rights again just the other night. Still has the same effect as it did all those years ago.

Just try and listen to what he says. A lot of it sounds like touchy-feely bullshit, I admit it, but he means every word. When he tells you you’re more than just meth-head Merle Dixon’s scraggly little brother, more than Will Dixon’s dumbass kid, who couldn’t even finish high school, and more than some ignorant redneck who’ll never be mourned by a single soul, _believe_ him.

You’ve got to put your faith in someone. If you keep walking through your life alone, I know where you plan on heading, and there’s no coming back from that. You can’t unring that bell. It’s a pussy way out, too, and you’re not a pussy.

I’m not fool enough to believe that any of what I’ve said in this dumbass letter will make a difference, but I don’t think it matters. What matters is, Rick is going to decide to take an interest in you. He’s going to decide you’re special, and you don’t deserve to be written off as a lost cause. He won’t be scared off by your special brand of redneck charm. He’ll still think you’re sexy when you’re covered in deer guts, and smell like you’ve been rolling around in a pigsty. He still reaches for your hand every chance he gets, and steals kisses that you’d give to him if he only asked.

He makes a family with you.

He makes your heart beat faster.

He makes you happy.

Let him.

What have you got to lose?

Hoping you’ll take all this advice, and save us some painful years,

37-year-old Daryl

P.s. When Rick gets the idea in his head to investigate that old hayloft? _Don’t. Let. Him._ If you think Merle was a pain in the ass when he got hurt, he has nothing on Rick fucking Grimes.

 


End file.
